Dirty Dad Jokes 2021 That Can Make You Laugh Loud

If you were searching about new dirty dad jokes 2021, so you are at the appropriate place. Today we’re gonna show you the best new 59 dirty jokes of 2021. Enjoy reading those dirty jokes, and be careful there are a lot of dirty words in this post. To get more funny jokes, Check this out: Bad Dad Jokes, Best funny dad jokes 

 

Dirty Dad Jokes 2021

1- What do tofu and dildo have in common?

They’re both meat substitutes.

 

2- What’s the hardest part about having anal sex?

Having a cock repeatedly shoved in your ass.

 

3- What did the penis say to the condom?

Cover me, I’m going in.

 

4- What happens when you make an Asian girl squirt?

She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

 

5- What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed?

A cherry float.

 

6- What does a condom and a gun have in common?

You should never use either one of them.

 

7- What’s long and hard and has cum in it?

A cucumber.

 

8- What did the one soggy boob say to the other soggy boob?

If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.

 

9- How do you know if a Mexican girl is pregnant?

Trust me, she is.

 

10- What do a woman and a bar have in common?

Liq-her in the front, poke her in the back.

 

11- A cop told a suspect to put his hands up…

And then he shot him. You know why?

Cuz he didn’t say ’Simon says put your hands up.’

 

12- How do kill a circus clown?

You go for the Juggular.

 

13- What do a black guy and a long-distance relationship have in common?

They both don’t work.

 

14- Why can’t you hear a psychiatrist use the bathroom?

Because the pee is silent.

 

15- Why did the neo-nazi fall his driver’s test?

Cuz he only made alt-rights.

 

16- What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market?

Good Morning, ladies.

 

17- Why did the Russian’s wife kick her husband out of bed?

Cuz he was Pootin.

 

18- When do women like to have sex with the lights off?

Because they can’t stand to see a man having a good time.

 

19- I saw a kaleidoscope having sex.

It came in all shapes and sizes.

 

20- Why can’t you stop a legless dog?

Cause he has no pause.

 

21- Why does a mermaid wear seashells?

She outgrew her a shells.

 

22- Whose the best singing fish in all of the sea?

Johnny Gills.

 

23- What do you call batman when he skips church?

Christian Bail.

 

24- Why didn’t patty like to play in the sun?

Because patty melts.

 

25- Why isn’t there a pregnant barbie doll?

Ken came in a different box.

 

26- You hear about the jump rope Elon Musk designed for big people?

It’s Groundbreaking.

 

27- DMX just tested positive with covid, and said he’s gon spread it towards everybody.

Like he told us before, x gon give it to Ya.

 

28- Did you hear about the sexually fluid buffalo that came out to his father?

He was a Bi-son.

 

29- What did the “O” say to the “Q”?

Your dick is out.

 

30- What do you call two weaves that get together?

It’s a track meet.

 

31 What goes in hard and dry but comes out soft and wet?

 Gum.

 

 

32- Did you hear about the little guy who won the surf competition?

He did it all on Microwaves.

 

33- Who is Thomas the tank engine’s favorite rapper?

Chew-Trains.

 

34- Soup?

The stock market.

 

35- What do you call an it teacher that touches his students?

A pdf file.

 

36- Who does a Pharaoh talk to when he’s sad?

His Mummy.

 

37- What’s the best thing about dating a homeless women?

You can drop her off anywhere.

 

38- What do you call a pitbull that lives in alaska?

A chili dog.

 

39- What’s the difference between a joke and 3 dicks?

Your mom can’t take a joke.

 

40- What do you call a gay drive-by?

A fruit roll-up.

 

41- Women with big tits work at hooters, where does a women with one leg work?

IHop.

 

42- I’m dating this hot midget that’s an airline pilot.

Shorty fly.

 

43- Why is a women like a condom?

Because they both spend more time in your wallet, than on your dick.

 

44- What’s slimy, cold, long, and smells like pork?

Kermit the frog’s finger.

 

45- What’s the difference between a priest and a pimple?

A pimple doesn’t cum on your face until you’re a teenager.

 

46- How do you get a Nun pregnant?

Dress her up as an altar boy.

 

47- Why don’t black peple go on cruises?

Because they already been fooled by that shit once.

 

48- What’s the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

  A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

 

49- How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just beat the shit out of the room for being black.

 

50- What do you call a 600lb dad that’s one cupcake away from exploding?

Pops.

 

51- What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market?

“Hello Ladies!”

 

52- Why doesn,t anyone want to shave a crazy sheep?

Because it’s a baaaaad idea.

 

53- A guy asked me if I wanted to donate for a swimming pool 

so I gave hi, a glass of water.

 

54- How did Rihanna find out that Chris Brown was cheating?

Because she found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.

 

55- Which sexual position leads to ugly children?

I don’t know either, ask your mother.

56- What did the Rapper say in the mirror?

“Game recognize game!”

 

57- I have the body of a 25 year old

But it’s in my refrigerator.

 

58- What did the sign on the door of the whore house say?

“Beat it, we’re closed.”

 

59- What do you call a white guy with a big dick?

Michael Jackson.