120 Funny Driver Jokes

Looking for some laughs on the road? Check out these hilarious driver jokes that will make you smile, chuckle, or even honk your horn!

Hilarious Driver Jokes

Get ready to laugh with a collection of hilarious driver jokes! These clean and light-hearted jokes will keep you entertained on the road. Enjoy!

1. What kind of car does Yoda drive? A Toyoda.
2. Why did the washing machine schedule a test drive? Because he wanted to go for a spin.
3. I don’t get why people are bothered by the sun while driving. I just close my eyes and it’s not a problem.
4. What do you call a speedster made of French bread? A Baguetti Veyron.
5. Why do electric cars finish the race early? Because they are on a short circuit.
6. Why did the owner name his vehicle ‘Bad News’? Because bad news travels fast.
7. What is a race car’s favourite food? Fast food.
8. 1050 Horsepower? How do you even fit one in there?
9. How do drivers eat healthily? They take the carb-orator off.
10. What do tornados say to race cars? “Let us go for a spin.”
11. As soon as the vehicle rolled into the pitstop, the jack said? “Can I give you a lift?”
12. When the motorsport driver wrecked his vehicle, the Mercedes AMG Petronas body shop was wreck-amended.
13. What happened when the French vehicle sponsored by the Brie manufacturers got wrecked? There was de-brie everywhere.
14. What is the least favourite meal for drivers? Brake-fast.
15. Who has the power to lift a vehicle in the vampire racing team? Count Jackula.
16. Why did the apostles drive a Honda? To be in one Accord.
17. Why are pigs bad drivers? They hog the road.
18. What do you say if you’re driving a Civic somewhere? I’m Honda way.
19. Which part of a car doesn’t get enough sleep? The wheels because they’re always tired.
20. Did you hear about the music teacher’s car accident? It was A minor one.
21. What kind of car do electricians drive? A Volts-wagen.
22. What do clowns use to fuel their cars? Laughing gas.
23. Why did the mechanic go to sleep under the car? He had to wake up very oily.
24. What kind of car did Jesus drive? A Christ-ler.
25. What kind of car does King Koopa drive? A Bowser-ati.
26. What kind of car do ghosts drive? A Boo-gatti.
27. Which car brand gives you three wishes? A Genie-us.
28. What do you call a fish that drives a car? A tuna-yota.
29. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
30. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

lorry driver jokes

Get ready for some roadside humour with these lorry driver jokes! Whether it’s about toupees, omega-3 supplements, or sugar, you’ll find something to laugh at!

1. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a magician? A transportation wizard!
2. Why did the lorry driver get a ticket? He was caught carrying too much baggage!
3. What did the lorry driver say when he hit a tree? “Timber!”
4. Why did the lorry driver quit his job? He couldn’t handle the haul!
5. How do you know a lorry driver is confident? He always has a lot of drive!
6. Why did the lorry driver refuse to take the day off? He was tired of being a steering committee!
7. Why did the lorry driver cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
8. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a mime? A silent hauler.
9. Why did the lorry driver get lost? He took the wrong turnip.
10. Why did the lorry driver refuse to take a shortcut? He didn’t want to get truckin’ lost.
11. Why did the lorry driver go to the dentist? To get his teeth pulled out and his fillings replaced with lug nuts.
12. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a clown? A honkin’ good hauler.
13. Why did the lorry driver get a speeding ticket? He was driving in the fast lane.
14. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a musician? A truckin’ good band.
15. Why did the lorry driver get fired? He kept taking long breaks.
16. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a lawyer? A wheelin’ dealin’ hauler.
17. Why did the lorry driver get a flat tire? He hit a nail.
18. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a doctor? A truckin’ good healer.
19. Why did the lorry driver get a bad haircut? He went to a truck stop barber.
20. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a chef? A truckin’ good cook.
21. Why did the lorry driver get a divorce? His wife said he was always taking long hauls.
22. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a farmer? A truckin’ good harvester.
23. Why did the lorry driver get a tattoo? He wanted to show his love for his job.
24. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a teacher? A truckin’ good educator.
25. Why did the lorry driver get a pet dog? He wanted a furry friend to keep him company on the road.
26. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a firefighter? A truckin’ good hero.
27. Why did the lorry driver get a promotion? He was a great asset to the company.
28. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a politician? A truckin’ good representative.
29. Why did the lorry driver get a medal? He was a true hero.
30. What do you call a lorry driver who is also a saint? A truckin’ good role model.

Coach Ddriver Jokes

Hop on board and enjoy these coach driver jokes! From golf jokes to bus driver puns, you’ll find something to make you laugh out loud!

1. Why did the coach driver quit his job? He couldn’t handle the wheel.
2. What do you call a coach driver who is also a magician? A transportation wizard!
3. Why did the coach driver get a ticket? He was caught carrying too many passengers!
4. What did the coach driver say when he hit a tree? “Timber!”
5. Why did the coach driver quit his job? He couldn’t handle the haul!
6. How do you know a coach driver is confident? He always has a lot of drive!
7. Why did the coach driver refuse to take the day off? He was tired of being a steering committee!
8. Why did the coach driver cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
9. What do you call a coach driver who is also a mime? A silent hauler.
10. Why did the coach driver get lost? He took the wrong turnip.
11. Why did the coach driver refuse to take a shortcut? He didn’t want to get truckin’ lost.
12. Why did the coach driver go to the dentist? To get his teeth pulled out and his fillings replaced with lug nuts.
13. What do you call a coach driver who is also a clown? A honkin’ good hauler.
14. Why did the coach driver get a speeding ticket? He was driving in the fast lane.
15. What do you call a coach driver who is also a musician? A truckin’ good band.
16. Why did the coach driver get fired? He kept taking long breaks.
17. What do you call a coach driver who is also a lawyer? A wheelin’ dealin’ hauler.
18. Why did the coach driver get a flat tire? He hit a nail.
19. What do you call a coach driver who is also a doctor? A truckin’ good healer.
20. Why did the coach driver get a bad haircut? He went to a truck stop barber.
21. What do you call a coach driver who is also a chef? A truckin’ good cook.
22. Why did the coach driver get a divorce? His wife said he was always taking long hauls.
23. What do you call a coach driver who is also a farmer? A truckin’ good harvester.
24. Why did the coach driver get a tattoo? He wanted to show his love for his job.
25. What do you call a coach driver who is also a teacher? A truckin’ good educator.
26. Why did the coach driver get a pet dog? He wanted a furry friend to keep him company on the road.
27. What do you call a coach driver who is also a firefighter? A truckin’ good hero.
28. Why did the coach driver get a promotion? He was a great asset to the company.
29. What do you call a coach driver who is also a politician? A truckin’ good representative.
30. Why did the coach driver get a medal? He was a true hero.

Woman Driver Jokes

Are you ready to laugh at some woman driver jokes? These jokes will make you wonder how they ever got their license! Don’t miss these hilarious gags and stories!

1. Why did the woman bring a ladder to the bar? She heard the drinks were on the house!
2. Why did the woman driver bring a car manual on her date? She wanted to brush up on her “driving” skills.
3. How do you confuse a woman driver? Put her in a roundabout and tell her to turn left.
4. What do you call a woman driver who doesn’t break any traffic laws? An urban legend!
5. Why did the woman driver keep a hammer in her car? For “nailing” the parallel parking!
6. What do you get when you mix a woman driver and a GPS? A lost connection!
7. Why did the woman driver always bring a map to the amusement park? She wanted to take the “roller coaster” route.
8. How do you know a woman driver is having a bad day? She forgets to use her turn signal… for an entire week!
9. Why did the woman driver keep a pair of sunglasses in her car? For when she needed some “shade” from the other drivers’ stares.
10. What do you call a woman driver who uses her blinker? A unicorn!
11. Why did the woman driver get a ticket for driving too slowly? She was trying to “catch up” with the speed limit!
12. How do you distract a woman driver? Ask her to find her favorite song on the radio!
13. Why did the woman driver take a ladder to the supermarket? She wanted to reach the “highway” shelves.
14. What do you call a woman driver who knows how to change a flat tire? Prepared!
15. Why did the woman driver bring a pillow to the driving test? She wanted to pass with “flying cushions.”
16. How do you make a woman driver go faster? Whisper, “There’s a sale at the mall!”
17. Why did the woman driver get a trophy? She successfully completed a three-point turn… in one try!
18. How do you know a woman driver is a pro? She can apply makeup and drive at the same time!
19. Why did the woman driver always carry a mirror in her car? To see the “reflection” of her excellent driving skills!
20. What’s a woman driver’s favorite dessert? Traffic jam!
21. Why did the woman driver bring a tape measure to the parking lot? She wanted to make sure her parking job was “measured to perfection.”
22. How do you make a woman driver accelerate? Tell her there’s a shoe sale at the next intersection!
23. What did the woman driver say when she finally parallel parked her car? “That’s how you make a ‘tire-rific’ entrance!”
24. Why did the woman driver prefer electric cars? She liked the idea of “shocking” other drivers with her eco-consciousness.
25. How do you get a woman driver to stop at a red light? Apply the brakes!
26. Why did the woman driver install a disco ball in her car? For some “groovy” driving experiences!
27. What do you call a woman driver who can navigate any city? A GPS goddess!
28. Why did the woman driver take her car to the dentist? She had a “toothache” in her engine.
29. How does a woman driver stay entertained during long drives? She listens to the “auto”-biographies of famous drivers!
30. Why did the woman driver bring a broom to the car wash? She wanted to “sweep” the competition away!

The End

In conclusion, we hope these 120 funny driver jokes have brought a smile to your face and brightened your day. Remember to share the laughter responsibly and always drive safely!