The Newest Dad Jokes 2023

Laugh out loud with the newest dad jokes that will make your day. From puns to wordplay, these jokes are guaranteed to crack you up.

Newest Dad Jokes 2023: Make Your Friends and Family Groan with Laughter

Looking for the newest dad jokes to tell your friends and family? Look no further! We have a collection of the funniest, groan-inducing dad jokes that are sure to make everyone laugh.

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
3. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
4. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
5. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
6. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear!
7. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
8. What do you call a cow with a bell on its neck? A cattle-bell!
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes and no brains? Fsh sticks!
10. What do you call a cow with no legs and no milk? Ground beef!
11. What do you call a cow with no legs and one eye? No idear!
12. What do you call a cow with no legs and two eyes? Ground beef with a view!
13. What do you call a cow with no legs and three eyes? Ground beef with a stereo view!
14. What do you call a cow with no legs and four eyes? Ground beef with a surround sound view!
15. What do you call a cow with no legs and five eyes? Ground beef with a 3D view!
16. What do you call a cow with no legs and six eyes? Ground beef with a panoramic view!
17. What do you call a cow with no legs and seven eyes? Ground beef with a 360 degree view!
18. What do you call a cow with no legs and eight eyes? Ground beef with a view of the future!
19. What do you call a cow with no legs and nine eyes? Ground beef with a view of the past, present, and future!
20. What do you call a cow with no legs and ten eyes? Ground beef with a view of the multiverse!
21. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
22. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
23. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
24. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
25. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
26. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
27. What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
28. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
29. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
30. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
31. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
32. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
33. What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty!
34. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
35. I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been tripping all day!
36. What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!
37. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know why.
38. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
39. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
40. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!
41. Why did the dad joke teller go to the police station? He wanted to file a complaint about a bad pun.
42. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A groan-er.
43. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a knock-knock joke? A knock-knock joke knows when to stop.
44. Why did the dad joke teller cross the road? To get to the other side… of the joke!
45. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s hilarious? A dad joke classic.
46. What’s the best thing about dad jokes? They’re always there for you, even when you don’t want them to be.
47. Why did the dad joke teller go to the doctor? Because he had a joke stuck in his throat.
48. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A punny joke.
49. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke? A dad joke is funny to dads.
50. Why did the dad joke teller get fired from his job? Because he kept telling puns.
51. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A groan-inducing pun.
52. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke? A dad joke is told by a dad.
53. Why did the dad joke teller get divorced? Because his wife couldn’t take his jokes anymore.
54. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A dad joke gem.
55. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke? A dad joke is told with a straight face.
56. Why did the dad joke teller go to jail? Because he was a groan offender.
57. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A dad joke masterpiece.
58. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke? A dad joke is told with love.
59. Why did the dad joke teller go to the doctor? Because he was feeling under the weather.
60. What do you call a dad joke that’s so bad it’s good? A dad joke goldmine.
61. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a bad joke? A dad joke is told to make you laugh, even if you don’t want to.
62. How do you organize a space party? You “planet”!
63. I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
64. What do you call a fish wearing a crown? King Cod!
65. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
66. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
67. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
68. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
69. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts!
70. Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint!
71. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
72. What’s the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty!
73. Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the “No-bell” prize!
74. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
75. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
76. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
77. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
78. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
79. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
80. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
81. How does a taco say grace? Lettuce pray!

The End

In the end, the newest dad jokes continue to prove that sometimes the simplest and silliest jokes can have the biggest impact. So, go ahead, share a dad joke, spread some cheer, and let the laughter ring out.